Red Light District

Keep your eyes open, your money out of sight, and don’t get pickpocketed, but the red light district is not as
dangerous as you might think. During the day, it seems more like a neighborhood. People live there. People work there. People pass through there on the way to someplace else. After dark, when the red lights shine brighter, the place is much more exciting.

Prostitutes
Just like every town in the world, Amsterdam has hookers. Unlike most cities, here many stand in windows with
red lights. Not that you were thinking about it, but the going rate starts at €50 for what they unpoetically call a “suck and fuck” (with condom). It takes fifteen minutes, and probably won’t be the most romantic experience you’ve ever had. On side streets, prices might be going down a bit in this economy. Prostitutes rent their windows for €100-€150 for a shift, and popular ones take in €5-600 a day. Some fill out tax returns and many belong to a loose union, the Red Thread. Having made their money, many women might have been gone by 1am in the old days. Today, the economy means you see more working later into the night.

Art
There has been a lot of talk about how much control the prostitutes have over their destiny and how much is forced by debt and drugs. The city (generally) takes the view that we need to close some windows to get rid of shady operators who traffic women. Some politicians see the cleaning up of Times Square as an inspiration.
Many in the red light district, however, disagree with the city’s plans. Studies suggest that the city is overstating the amount of forced prostitution, and experience teaches us that things get worse when they are pushed more underground. Right or wrong, the city has closed down about 25% of the windows and given them over to artists and designers at very low rents. Longtime visitors may be shocked to see mannequins and clothes in some windows where there used to be live bodies and no clothes. The jury is still out on whether supporting up and coming fashion designers with taxpayer money is good for tourism and the neighborhood.
We guess it’s better than the Olive Garden, or other bland Times Square businesses opening in Amsterdam.




























Real Live Sex Show
Believe it or not, expect exactly what the signs promise. After haggling about the price with the multilingual doorman, take a seat in the small cabaret. One can expect most of the following:a vaginal muscle demonstration, a male stripper, a lesbian 69 number, and the grand finale: real live sex. Set your sights
right as it is more interesting than erotic. But no matter how you slice it, a man and a woman will come on stage, engage in mechanical foreplay, work the gentleman to a 3/4-erection, and have sex before your eyes. Tweet about that!
The best show in the red light district is Casa Rosso. No haggling about the price here; everybody pays the posted €30 But you get a high(er) quality, reasonably sexy show starring attractive men and women in a clean and well-lit theater. Much to our surprise, a third of the audience was women. If you show a Boom Magazine to the cashier (or print this out), the first drink is on the house. Why not make it an expensive cocktail? Oude-zijds Achter-burgwal 106.
The nastier Banana Bar is a, uh, unique place where naked women alternate between filling your drinks and performing erotic parlor tricks, including their trademark banana routine. €45 includes all you can drink for an hour and the opportunity to pay €20 to start a performance. Not surprisingly, a bachelor party mentality pervades and (clothed) women would definitely feel out of place. Oudezijds Achter-burgwal 37.

Strip Club
Unbelievably, Amsterdam has only one, and it feels provincial. That’s not to say you can’t enjoy La Vie en Prost. You walk down a tiny alley past window-tapping prostitutes to an open door. It leads to a surreal, quirky den with primitive lighting and two naked women dancing on the bar. You’ll feel like you’re in a
Quentin Tarantino movie, atmosphere wise. The women are reasonably attractive, but don’t expect models or luxuries like a coat check or backs on your stools. Open 10--3, 4am Fri-Sat €5 cover, €6,50 beers, €10 lap
dances plus tip.


Sex Shops
No one should be embarrassed or scared to poke their heads in a sex shop. Golden showers? German naturalists? French S&M? Look through the magazines, but not too long. You can be sure the man behind
the counter knows “this isn’t a library” in every language. Absolute Danny has a classy mix of underwear and
outerwear where fetish meets lingerie. Oude-zijds Achter-burgwal 78.

A Beautiful Walk
Randy Roy’s Redlight Tours is a 30 minute walking tour and Tripadvisor 2011 Certificate of Excellence recipient focuses on the humorous and contemporary stories of the red light district. See where Quentin
Tarantino wrote Pulp Fiction. See Eminem and Mike Tyson’s favorite coffee shop. See the club with the darkroom floor that Jean Pier Gaultier passed out on (and woke up stuck to). Much of it is even true! €12,50
includes one free drink. Meets in front of the Victoria Hotel across from Central Station every day at 8pm, Fri and Sat at 8pm and 10pm. No tours Dec – Feb. Reserve at 0641 853 288.
For a stroll through the nicest part of the red lights, start at H5 on the map and walk up the Oude-zijds
Achter-burgwal canal. At the end, cross the bridge and come back the other side. This saunter past the Hash
Museum, Casa Rosso, Banana Bar, the Erotic Museum, and lively bars, stores, peep shows, and windows takes about 15 minutes if you don’t stop.